Closing Ceremonies

The big entertainment advance introduced at the Winter Olympics closing ceremony came in a vertical wind tunnel that blew flying people up in the air as if they were styrofoam balls.

Affixed with little skis and snowboards, the unidentified fliers represented the winter athletes in their aerial maneuvers. Except they didn’t crash unexpectedly.

Nothing about the ceremonies was political. A guy yelling during one official's speech turned out to be promoting an online gambling site. But if things got a little goofy during the closing ceremonies of the Winter Olympics, but maybe because of all those clown references.

Even the athletes were given clown noses, but not many wore them. And those that did just as often wore them on top of their heads, atop their caps or at the sides of their heads. Because that’s how crazy these athletes are.

There was a lot of waving going on as they all said goodbye. But what about those athletes who carry their own video cameras? Can’t they get somebody at home to tape it?

Among entertainers, Avril Lavigne looks like she’s outgrown any punk pretensions she might have had, looking now like a Kylie Minogue type on the way to becoming this millennium’s Anne Murray with her pop song.

Andrea Bocelli better reflected the Italian grandeur of the event, singing his operatic pop as 400 women in bridal gowns swirled around him.

Ricky Martin’s first song was pretty bad – the most obviously lip-synched number (though they probably all were), the onetime Latin heartthrob was surrounded by hooker-dressed backup dancers who looked as out of place amid the brides as bachelor party strippers would at a wedding.