1,000 Interviews Too Many

Her hair and face all done up in a swirl, Joan Rivers had a dumb device to mark her longevity on the red carpet Sunday at the Emmys.

There was a box that counted the number of stars she interviewed, counting up to the 1,000 interviewees.

In 100-degree-plus temperatures, her plastic surgery threatening to melt any moment, she had her stars press a button that advance the number from 980 to 981 to 982. Do you feel the tension rising?

Rivers seemed surprised every time the next number was exactly like the last number plus one.

Pity the poor production assistant who had to count the number of interviews she had done up to this point. How many times can somebody say “Who are you wearing?” How do these qualify as interviews?

Sunday, the event was called “Joan & Melissa’s 1,000th Interview” but it seemed like Melissa Rivers’ interviews didn’t count at all. (That’s how I always felt anyway).
Only mom’s interviewees could hit the button.

So I won’t keep you in suspense. Come 7:15 p.m., it was Debra Messing – Grace of TV’s “Will & Grace” who got the distinction.

Joan was relieved. “I was so worried it was going to be somebody ugly or somebody who we didn’t know who the hell it was,” the gracious host said.

As a result, Messing got to give a big cardboard $10,000 to the charity of choice – it was to the organization One to fight AIDSs and extreme poverty. (Joan & Melissa had apparently never heard of it.)

She also got a big golden, supposedly vibrating, statue of Joan herself. And because she didn’t win the Emmy for outstanding actress in a comedy in her last eligible year for “Will & Grace,” it was the only award Messing got all night.