David Letterman was in the middle of his jokes about Sen. John McCain in his monologue Tuesday. You know the ones that almost sound like random non sequitirs but generally play to the candidate's age:
- He looks like the guy at the hardware store who makes the keys.
- He looks like the guy who can’t stop talking about how well his tomatoes are doing.
- He looks like the why who goes into town for turpentine.
- He looks like the guy who has has wiry hair growing out of new places.
- He looks like the guy who points out the spots they missed at the car wash.
Then McCain walked out to interrupt. "Hey Letterman. you think that's funny?"
And he proceeded with his own list about the host, doubtless written by the same staff:
- You look like a guy whose laptop would be seized by the authorities.
- You look like a guy caught smuggling reptiles in his pants.
- You look like the guy who the neighbors later say, 'he mostly kept to himself.'
- You look like the night manager of a creepy motel.
- You look like the kind of guy who likes to get in a hot tub and watchhis swim trunks inflate.
Is this how the presidential campaign is going to play out? On whose delivery of comic lines is better?
Well, the senator, listed as main guest of the show, returned later to do a more formal sit-down. Coming out twice, he got two Paul Shaffer songs: "Soldier Boy" and "You're Still a Young Man" (and during the commercial break: "Rollercoaster").
It was on Letterman's show, keep in mind, where McCain first formally announced his candidacy a year ago. So with that sense of ownership, the host spent a lot of time asking about the time the campaign was fizzling -- old news at best. McCain for his part kept things entertaining, bringing with him lines old and new to use out.
It was after the break, Letterman broke out the issues, starting with the economy, then after another break, Iraq and the world's standing in the world.
Letterman seemed a little agitated by the war talk. In one camera shot, he appeared to be a head taller than McCain when sitting. An outsider wouldn't easily guess which one were running.
McCain didn't hang out to catch the incongruous musical guest, Cat Power, who sang a remake of her own "Metal Heart."
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