'Secret Talents of the Stars'

Boy, is this terrible.

Network reality talent competitions reaches a new low with CBS' "Secret Talent of the Stars" which blends the blind alliance to anything in an "American Idol" format with the requisite casting of B-list "stars."

In this one, performance and results come in the same hour, as viewers must cast their votes online during the commercial breaks between acts. Forget having an hour after the show is over. You get three minutes tops and that's it.

The panel of "judges" are more ineffectual than ever. All they are apparently charged to do is ape their "Idol" counterparts. Brian McKnight is the Randy Jackson of the bunch, the elderly Debbie Reynolds is the Paula Abdul of her era, and Gavin Polone, previously a producer never seen on screen, does his best to be the mean judge, down to scowling when being introduced and describing performances as "sucky."

In this case, however, he's right, as George Takei's stab at country singing is best left in the shower stall where he honed it. Either McKnight can't hear or he can't be honest if he said the former Lt. Sulu was on key the whole way through. Off-key the whole way through is more like it. Find it on YouTube and you won't see a more tuneless song sung by a star all year on any network.

Not much better was Clint Black trying out comedy material with the kind of success George Bush has in the same department. Deadly stuff that can't be saved with a Texas grin. (Still, Polone said he liked him even if he didn't have material).

Viewers during the commercial break voted Black to return in the semi-finals. Also returning is Sasha Cohen, the Olympic skater whose switch to contortionist among Chinese circus acrobats doesn't seem much of a stretch. She was the upset winner over Mya, the R&B singer who tried to revive her tap skills. Judges liked her, but viewers during the commercial break didn't as much (or maybe they had to get a snack during that commercial break).

Another four celebs endure the humiliation next week in the show hosted by John O'Hurley, who insists on using that pompous inflated voice he once used as Peterman on "Seinfeld," as if he's imitating a game show host throughout. Perhaps this is his secret talent.

Comments

[sgewg]

aww, u couldnt approve of my post? Whats the matter, u can dish it out but baby cant take it?

[FedUpWithLibs]

What the HELL does this show, or review, have to do with our great Pres George W Bush? You leftists crack me up-you cant stop dissing him even when its got nothing to do with the sun rising in the morniing! Grow up, get over the 2000 election, and good god old man, for once in your life, tubby, EAT A SALAD!

[Shawn Lang]

B list? You're being oh so kind...